I HERALD-LEADER KENTUCKY.COM CITY REGION SATURDAY, AUGUST 22, 2009 D3 Son's suicide opened a new path for Army general WORKING TO CHANGE STIGMA OF MENTAL ILLNESS IN MILITARY for signs FRANKFORT A highranking Army commander who lost both sons one by suicide, the other in combat is channeling his grief into action as a leading national voice against what he calls the stigma of mental illness, particularly among military personnel. Mark Graham and his wife, Carol, were keynote speakers Friday at a suicide prevention conference at the Frankfort Convention Center attended by about 300 people, many of whom have also lost loved ones to suicide. The couple's youngest son, Kevin, hanged himself at his in 2003 when he was an ROTC cadet at the University of Kentucky. The Grahams' trauma amplified seven months later when their oldest son, Jeffrey, died in a bomb blast in Iraq, where he was stationed as a platoon leader. The events nearly pushed the highly decorated general out of the military for good.
Eventually, however, he determined his true calling was to stay and help spread By Jeffrey McMurray Associated Press "Our journey has tested our faith, it has rattled our moral courage and left us feeling empty and hopeless at times. Most importantly, though, it has provided us direction." Mark Graham who has lost two sons, one to suicide and one to a bomb blast in Iraq a vital message that getting treatment for depression is a sign of strength, not weakness, especially with the stress of armed service. "Our journey has tested our faith, it has rattled our moral courage and left us feeling empty and hopeless at times," said Graham, a former commanding general in Fort Carson, who is assuming a new role at Fort McPherson in Atlanta. "Most importantly, though, it has provided us direction." The military has improved its response to mental illness in recent years, Graham said, although eliminating its stigma in an environment where toughness is supposed to prevail remains difficult. INGRAM Local Anna Lee Curtis, 84, Nelson Fant, 89, died Aug 2, 2009, at Treasure Coast Hospice in Fort Pierce, FL.
He was born in Sharpsburg, KY, and lived in Port St. Lucie, FL for the last six years. He had been a long term resident of Lexington and Versailles, KY, where he retired from Texas Instruments. He served in the Army Signal Corps during World War II. In 1942 1 he trained Army Air Corps operators in the use of top-secret airborne radar technology at Boca Raton Army Air Field.
Later he set up and ran radio communications and intercept installations on Guam and Iwo Jima. He was honorably discharged with the rank of Major. Survivors include his daughters and sonsin-law, Elizabeth Botts Penrod and Hugh, Madeline Botts Meixner and Robert, all of Port St. Lucie, FL, Jane Botts Bradley and Balfe of Fort Collins, CO, Susan Botts Rose and Richard of Boca Raton, FL; six grandchildren, (Davis Watts, Elizabeth Watts Brian Watts, Mason and Caleb Bradley, Ricky Nelson Rose) and five greatgrandchildren, (Madelyne and Ethan Watts, Alex and Anthony Chloe Watts). He was preceded in death by his wife of 53 years, Madeline Miller Botts; sisters, May Elizabeth Botts Janes and Nancy Botts Hart; and brother, Seth Saunders Botts.
Memorial contributions may be made to the Parkinson's Disease Foundation at http://www.pdf.org/e Services: A celebration of life was held on Aug 8 at Avalon State Park Beach in Fort Pierce, FL. Burial will be at Camp Nelson National Cemetery in Nicholasville KY on Fri, Nov 27, 2009 at MORELOCK Maryrhea Mullins. Memorial Service 2-4pm Sat, Aug 22, 2009 at Lexington Friends Meeting House, 649 Price Avenue, Lexington, KY. In lieu of flowers donations may be made to the Lexington Friends Meeting. Now she blames herself not noticing warning earlier.
For example, Now when a soldier enters basic training, he or she is given a playing card an ace of hearts with instructions on the back. The letters A-C-E represent the words "ask, care and escort" the steps all soldiers are expected to take if they suspect depression among one of their comrades. "We need to get in front of suicide," Graham said. "We must work to prevent it by action, not just figure it out after the fact." The Grahams were stationed in South Korea when Kevin took his own life, but he constantly assured them life as a cadet was actually helping curb his previously diagnosed mental illness because it gave him a sense of community. However, his parents think he went off his antidepressant when he entered training to avoid detection by his peers.
"I felt like the worst mother in the world shame, embarrassment, guilt, to lose a son to suicide," said Carol Graham, a Kentucky native who met her husband when both attended Murray State University. "Part of that will never go away." she recalls Kevin an avid Shakespeare reader telling her over the phone that he thought his brain must not work anymore because he was having trouble understanding Hamlet. "If he'd called and said, 'My lungs don't work, my heart doesn't work, my kidneys don't I would have been all over it," she said. "But sometimes when people say, 'My brain doesn't we don't take it seriously." She still wears a dog tag with Kevin's picture on one side and Jeffrey's on the other and chooses which side to show depending on whose story she most wants to share each day. On this day, Kevin's story directly spoke to the conference.
"The single most important lesson I have learned is that no one is isolated from hardship," Mark Graham said. "Everyone seems to be going through something, either directly or indirectly. Leaders are human and just as vulnerable as anyone else. "We are compelled to speak out to all the Kevins of the world who have no voice," he said. Obituaries Memorials Find obituaries and memorials at kentucky.com Hall of Jehovah's Witnesses at 400 Kingston Rd, Lex, KY.
Kerr Brothers Funeral Home, Harrodsburg Rd. handling arrangements. MARK Vivian 93, formerly of Mt. Sterling, died Tue. Widow of Richard Mark, retired teacher, WWII Veteran, member of Methodist Church.
Survived by three children; Richard Mark, Lexington; Karen ington; and Loris Swango, Mt. Sterling; and six grandchildren. memorial services to be announced. Taul Funeral Home in charge. SILYUK Stepan, 68, died Fri.
Service 11am Sat, St. Andrews Anglican Church, Versailles. Legacy CENTER funerals cremations receptions State BEATTYVILLE Lucille Johnson, 63, wife of James, died Thu. Service 2pm Sun. Visit 5-9pm Sat, Booneville Funeral Home.
BEREA John M. Webb, 84, died Thu. Funeral 2pm Sun, Davis Powell Funeral Home. Visit 5-9pm Sat. www.davisandpowellfuneralhome.com BROOK SVILLE Steve Wood, 63, died Wed.
Service 3pm Sun at Moore Parker Funeral Home. Visit 12-3pm at funeral home. mooreandparkerf.com CAMPBELLSVILLE Curt Flinchum, 89, husband of Norma Jean, died Fri. Funeral 1pm Mon, Parrott Ramsey Funeral Home. Visitation 5pm Sun.
MANCHESTERKenneth Wagers, 45. Service 2pm Sun, Britton Funeral Home. Visit 6pm Sat. ED REINKE ASSOCIATED PRESS They are Legion Military veteran motorcyclists rode on Interstate 64 in Shelbyville on Friday on their way to the American Legion's national convention in Louisville. The 400 riders participating in the fourth annual Legacy Run covered 1,200 miles to raise more than $400,000 for the American Legion Scholarship Fund.
wife of Eugene "Shorty" Ingram, died Thu, Aug 20, 2009 at Sayre Christian Village. Born in Stamping Ground, KY, she was the daughter of the late S.A. "Fonzy" and Claudia McFarland Curtis. Mrs. Ingram was a retired salesperson for K- Mart Corporation and a member of Trinity Baptist Church.
She was the loving mother of her three children, Ronald (Beverly) Ingram, Versailles, KY, Beverly (Carl) Vice, Lexington, KY, and Kevin (Lucy) Ingram, Paris, KY; six grandchildren, Lorie (David) Adams, Hyden, KY, Kellie (Eddie) Thurman, Andy (Rhonda) Ingram, Amy Vice (Ken) Marshall, all of Versailles, KY, and Jason Ingram and Ashley Ingram, both of Lexington, KY; twelve great grandchildren; a brother, Darrell (Libby) Curtis, Georgetown, KY; and numerous nieces and nephews. She was preceded in death by a granddaughter, Shellie Ingram. Funeral services will be Mon at Kerr Brothers Funeral Home, Harrodsburg Rd. by Pastor Jay Robison, PhD and Bro. David Stokes.
Burial will follow in Lexington Cemetery. Pallbearers will be Gene Bailey, Jerry Bootze, Bruce Brumley, Kendell Hunter, Joe Nichols, and Dennis Rice. Visitation will be 4-7pm Sun at the funeral home. Memorial contributions are suggested to Trinity Baptist Church, 1675 Strader Dr, Lex, KY 40505. WEDDERBURN Suwaiah Paige, 21, daughter of Elario Wedderburn and Brenda Wedderburn died Mon, Aug 17, 2009 at her home in Lexington, KY.
She was a graduate of Dunbar High School and an employee at Kroger in Beaumont. Services will be held 4pm Sat at Kingdom OWINGSVILLE Janet Clara Deibert Biller, 67, wife of Robert, died Thu. Funeral 1pm Mon, Herald Stewart Home for Funerals. Visit 6-9pm Sun. PAINTSVILLE Edna Jenkins, 81, widow of Harold Jenkins, died Thu.
Funeral 11am Sun, Pigeon EB Church, Oil Springs. Visit 10am Sat, church. PARIS Frances P. Bales, 86, of Paris, KY. A retired employee of the State of Kentucky's Dept.
for Human Resources passed away Thu, Aug 20, 2009. She was the daughter of the late Charles Picklesimer Virginia Gilmore Yochym and the granddaughter of the late Edward Anna Marrs Picklesimer. She was preceded in death by her husband Don B. Bales, her brother Ed Picklesimer sister Rose Yochym. She is survived by her sister Barbara Weber of Bridgeport, WV; sons Ed Bales of Cincinnati, OH Dave (Michelle) Bales of Paris; beloved grandchildren Matt Bales of Paris Katie (Dave) Sayer of Adelaide Australia along with many cousins, nieces nephews.
She was a member of First Baptist Church of Paris, the Emily Smith Sunday school class and the WMU. She was a former board member for AccuTran Industries sheltered workshop program and a volunteer of various charitable organizations in Bourbon County. Services will be handled by Hinton Turner Funeral Home of Paris. Visitation will be Sun evening, Aug. 23 at First Baptist Church in Paris from 5-8pm.
Funeral services will also be at the church at Mon morning. Memorial contributions may be made to the First Baptist Church scholarship fund. www.hintonturnerfuneralhome.com CAMPBELLSVILLE Kezia Ximenes, 1, daughter of Vanedson and Heidy, died Thu. Funeral 10am Mon, Parrott Ramsey Funeral Home. Visitation after 5pm Sun.
DANVILLE Elijah P. Faulconer, III, 83, died Aug 18, 2009. Memorial 11am Mon at St. Philips Episcopal Church, Harrodsburg, KY. Stith Funeral Home.
FLORENCE Anna Ruth Mitchell White, 82, died Thu, Aug 20, 2009. Service noon Sun, A.R. Dyche Cemetery in London. Arr by Connley Bros in Latonia, KY. GREENUP Tryphena Gay "Teen" Burney, 75, of South Shore, died Thu, Aug 20, 2009.
Funeral 1pm Sun, Wright's Funeral Home. Visit 6pm Sat. HARRODSBURG Loraine Burns, 100, died Thu. Services 2pm Sun at Ransdell Funeral Chapel. Visit after 5pm Sat.
HAZARD Emaline Gambill, 86, died Thu. Visit 6-9pm Sat, Maggard's Mtn. View Chapel. Service 1pm Sun. LIBERTY Pearl Tarter, 87, died Thu.
Visit 6pm Sat, Bartle Funeral Home. Funeral 2pm Sun. LIBERTY Christine Jeffers, 85, died Fri. Visit 5pm Sun. Funeral 2 2pm Mon, Bartle Funeral Home Chapel.
LONDON Chester "Cat" Gregory, 82, husband of Gladys Gregory. Visit 6-9pm Sat, HouseRawlings Funeral Home. Service 1pm Sun. LYNCH Goldie Boldin, 89, passed away Wed. Visit 11am-1pm Sat, Tri City Funeral Home in Benham.
MARTIN Wallace Frazier, 83, of Live Oak, FL, formerly of Price, KY, died Tue. Funeral 11am Sat, Nelson Frazier Funeral Home. MARTIN Irene Whitt Turner, 83, McDowell, died Fri. Funeral 1pm Sun, Hall Funeral Home Chapel. Visit after 5pm Sat.
hallfuneralservice.com MIDWAY Sarah Ann McColl, was given as a gift to Mike and Heather McColl on Dec 24, 2008. In her 8 months, she was a joy and a true blessing. Her love, her smile, and her beautiful blue eyes helped change the world. She is an angel who has returned home and is now the baby that this world would not let her be. Survivors other than her parents include maternal grandparents Lewis and Sandra Woodruff, NC, paternal grandparents Doug IN, aunts and uncles Laura and Matt Murray, NC, Andi and David McColl, MI Corina and Rich McColl, CA and cousin Amanda McColl.
Funeral service will be 10am Mon at Midway Christian Church officiated by Rev. Bill McDonald. Burial will follow in Midway Cemetery. Friends may call from 3-5pm Sun at Clark Funeral Home, Rose Hill. MOREHEAD L.J.
Salmons, 52, Bradenton, FL. Visit 10am and service 3pm Sat, Northcutt Son Home for Funerals. www.northcuttandson.com MORELAND Howard Lee Brackett, 82 of Danville died Thu. Memorial service 2pm Sat at W.L. Pruitt Funeral Home.
PAINTSVILLE Louella Jayne, 83, widow of Melvin Jayne, died Mon. Funeral 11am Sat, Paintsville Funeral Home. Visit 9am Sat. MT STERLING Milton Douglas "Doug" Davis, 69, of Harpers Ridge Road, Mt. Sterling died on Thu.
Retired employee of Hobart and Winn-Dixie. Husband of Joyce K. Davis of Mt. Sterling; father of Angie Davis Banfield of Lexington; grandfather of Brandon Douglas Banfield and Niki Banfield, both of Mt. Sterling; and five two great grandchildren; ward Keith Davis and Palmer Davis, Jr, both of Mt.
Sterling; and one sister, Pamela Spencer of Corbin, KY. Funeral 11am Mon, Taul Funeral Home. Visitation 5-7pm Sun. NICHOLASVILLE Ray Clifton Jones, 61, husband of Sally Jones, died Aug 20, 2009. Services will be 11am Mon at Betts West Funeral Home.
Visitation will be from 5-8pm Sun. Donations are suggested to Hospice of the Bluegrass. Online guestbook at www.BettsandWestfuneralhome remember the love the laughter the special moments shared. PIKEVILLE Floyd "Bill" Chaney, 69, died Wed. Visit 6pm Sat, open visit Sun, Thacker Funeral Home.
Funeral 11am Mon. PINE KNOTTraci Lyn Hamlin Adkins, 28, of Lexington, formerly of Pine Knot died Tue. Services 8pm Fri, Pine Knot Funeral Home. Visit 5-8pm Fri. RICHMOND Jonah Cecil Parke "J.C.Parks", 68, husband of Ann Z.
Parke, died Thu. Service 3pm Sun, Combs, Parsons Collins Funeral Home. Visit 1 3 Sun. www.cpcfh.com SALT LICK Larry Oldfield, 61, brother of Reva Hannah, died Fri. Funeral 1pm Tue, Herald Stewart Home for Funerals.
Visit 11am-1pm Tue. SHELBYVILLEStanley Morton Moffett, 73, died Fri, Aug 21, 2009. Funeral Mon, Hall-Taylor Funeral Home. Visitation 2-8pm Sun. SOMERSET Stanley Cornett, 80, died Aug 21, 2009.
Visit after 6pm Sat, Lake Cumberland Funeral Home. Funeral 2pm Sun, funeral home memory chapel. When the need is KERR BROTHERS E. Main St. 859.252.6767 342463 Harrodsburg Rd.
859.223.3140 www.kerrbrothersfuneralhome.com Life is what you celebrate. All of it. Even at its end. J. Harris.
